To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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