On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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