I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
