I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
