She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
