Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Randomize
