I want to stick my p in your. b.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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