You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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