Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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