What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
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