note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Randomize