Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
