I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
