no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
