We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
