I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize