I accidentally had phone sex last night
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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