Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
