If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize