brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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