So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
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It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
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No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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