rhymes with "ouble enetration"
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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