It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
