does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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