some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
