I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize