everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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