I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Randomize
