He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
