??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
