I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
