are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize