I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Randomize
