Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
