Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
