Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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