Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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