i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week š
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at templeĀ
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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