I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
