Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
