oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize