She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I supernannyed him into submission
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
