My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
