a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize