So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Randomize
