I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
