We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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