Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
