this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
