Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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