I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize